Do you know what they call it in Psychology: They call it the state of dissociation.
Do you know what that is?
Actually, DON’T. Don’t answer the question before reading this post. I guess, it will tell you all about dissociation– or what I like to call the state of detachment.
It started early. I look at my life as a journey, from one goal to another; one mission to the next.
That’s great. I mean, there is nothing wrong with that. I would accomplish one mission, as perfectly as I could– because that was also a condition, doing things perfectly– and then I would move to the next goal, and start working on attending it.
And then, it became about the way I looked at life; It become a series or missions to me. Just that, missions and goals.
Don;t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with looking at life as such a journey. The problem is, I cannot draw myself goals anymore.
This also leads to rushing through tasks, missions, or what I call the dull daily repetitive roles that we have to play. I end up doing that because I have no goals, right?! Because I want to know what’s coming next!
I started looking at life as a journey, yes, but one that takes me from one point to another. No goals anymore.
No, I am not a depressed person, nor am I a drama queen– If that’s what crossed your mind.
I am just someone who could not find any motivating goals in life, anymore.
So I decided to be detached; to dissociate myself. I live life now as a NORMAL human being. As someone who knows she’s playing a role; the role of living.
The idea of normality is changing me, my being, my core, who I am– Who I really am– and this is scaring me.
This idea is dragging me towards monotony; but most dangerously, towards normality. it’s leading me to that path taken and followed by the 99% of us. The rest of us.
So now, tell me, have you experienced this? Have you ever experienced the state of detachment?